I follow a lot of different blogs. Mostly fellow quilters. Normally I’m really excited to read all the new blog posts every day but for the past month I have not been reading them. It just felt like one more thing on the “To Do” list. Last night I finally sat down and enjoyed some of my favorite blogs. And it felt a little bit like the good ‘ol days.
And when catching up on my blogs I read Lisa’s post Spinning Your Way Through Life and it really hit home for me. Lately I’ve been struggling with figuring out how to do everything I want to do. And it really does feel like anytime you do one thing, another thing gets left behind. And the more things I start doing the more I struggle with the frustration that I feel like I’m not doing anything well anymore.
So, I thought, how do I deal with this? I think the first thing is letting go of the idea that I have to do everything really well (easier
said written than done), and the other thing is to reevaluate what is really important to me so I can focus my time and energy on those things.
Here we go: What’s Important to Me:
– Being a great partner for my husband. Which means: Loving him by paying attention to what is important to him (for example I may believe that having the dishes washed and the house clean shows him that I love him, but to him that doesn’t mean anything compared to greeting him at the door when get gets home with a hug and kiss). Supporting him in his professional endeavors, and being patient while he figures out what that is. Listening to him (especially since after a day of listening to other people’s problems all day, I like to be the TALKER). It’s important to constantly be present in the moment and focusing on US together.
– Being healthy. I feel like I am diagnosing pre-diabetes, diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol all day long. It is super alarming. When I met my husband I did not have very many healthy habits: I ate a lot of packaged and cafeteria food (um, residency anyone?), didn’t exercise, and honestly didn’t really think about things too much. The combination of seeing a lot of unhealthy people with watching a few documentaries and reading some different articles, has really changed me. I want to eat mostly vegetarian, eat as little processed food as possible, and start to work out regularly. I feel fortunate to have just found a great fitness teacher at my gym (I am majorly externally motivated).
– Staying in touch with friends and family. Since I grew up in Minnesota, lived in Costa Rica for a year, lived in Boston for a few years and now live in Los Angeles I have accumulated friends all over the world. And my family is still in Minnesota. So, other than moving everyone here to Los Angeles, I am stuck doing the long distance thing with lots of people. I am trying to Skype regularly with my niece and nephew and talk on the phone and email family and friends. All of that spells: T-I-M-E. So the first thing I did was increase my phone plan last month to account for this. I have learned that my commute is a good time to multi-task (don’t tell the traffic cops). And I am also trying to get back to Minnesota about every 3 months.
– Quilting/Dancing/Reading/Blogging. Here’s all the other stuff I am trying to do. Each of these seems to go through its ups and downs depending on my mood and energy/fatigue level. These are the things that make me really excited, but seem to be at the bottom of the list and only get done when everything else has already happened. And then the guilt starts to creep in, and all the “shoulds” start to crowd my brain.
I just need to focus on what things are meaningful to me. And worry less about the rest.